I’m Very Sorry For Destroying the Earth and All the Plastic…

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WITHIN THE NEXT FIFTY YEARS OR SO, or depending on who wins the next several national elections in any of the G8 or G20 countries, we’re finally going to have World Environmental Peace. Sure we’ll still be waging war on each other over things like land and water and religion, but as humans we will hopefully and finally stop our insane daily dependence on non-sustainable products and start to clean up the last hundred-plus years of air, land, water, body, and ocean pollution. Everything that will be made will be renewable or biodegradable and non-harmful to the next seven generations of Earthlings. When that day comes we’ll all be driving air-and-sun-powered cars and living off of wind-and-solar grids while balancing near-carbon-free diets for our bodies and businesses. The air will be clean, the water pure, and the carbon unspent. Until then, however, I have a few last Future Clean-Earth Bachelor Party-like requests. First, I want a sandwich wrapped in wax paper, then wrapped in plastic, taped, and then put in a large plastic bag so I can throw it all away after the roughly thirteen minutes it takes to eat it. I also want a separate bag of chips and a tiny plastic cup of yogurt with a plastic spoon, so I can then throw it all away (along with a waxed-paper cup that can’t be sorted, topped with a plastic lid and straw which I will not recycle).

Read the rest here at the Good Men Project

 

And read almost everything else Jeremy has written here and here.

 

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